I wasn't a bath person. I didn’t soak. Heck, there are days where showers feel like a chore.

As a kid, I fantasized of living in a future that would resemble The Jetsons. I’d imagine standing in the bathroom, closing my eyes, lazily lifting my arms (while still yawning) and through space age innovation I’d be washed, dressed and coiffed in 30 seconds flat by my personal robot.

As I got older, and a little wiser, I’ve rediscovered the enchantment of baths. We spend our entire lives shedding the little joys in life in the pursuit of bigger everything and we wonder why there’s this constant low level thrum of dissatisfaction. Everything has to be fast, effective, efficient. Now our iPhones are waterproof. Why? Where are we going with those phones? 

My daughters used to beg for baths instead of me showering them down when they were a little older than toddlers. I asked them why they loved baths so much. My older daughter simply replied, “They’re fun and relaxing.” The younger chimed in and said, “Yeah.” Simple. Me in my head, “Who has the time? And why does a 5 and 7-year old need to relax?”

A few years ago, after a long day of traveling and meetings, I decided to take advantage of the gargantuan tub in the hotel I was staying at. I felt burnt out and bone deep tired. I filled the tub and steeped like a tea bag. After a few minutes, I thought to myself, “This is proof that kids sometimes (sometimes) know more than adults.” 

More recently, baths have become a weekly part of my life. As a runner, and of a certain age, my body doesn’t bounce back as fast as it did before. Aches are more pronounced. Soreness linger just a little longer. At first, it was soaking in water as hot as I could stand it. Then, I graduated to epsom salts. I’ve now reached the apex of soaking and use Hellen Bath Brews.

I discovered Hellen by Hellen Yuan while running errands near Koreatown in Manhattan at Maison 10. Infused with reiki energy, I read on the label of a package. I was immediately skeptical. What hogwash. This coming from me, a person who goes to monthly reiki sessions. I decided to try Emerge from the Fog, because, truthfully, I’ve a thing for packaging. Expectations were low -- at the very least, it’ll be a very pretty and fragrant soak. 

And?

Transformed. 

No lie. 

I felt clearer, more assured, relaxed yet focused -- for days after. Of course, I had to learn more about Hellen and what other magical products existed. The first page of a site that I consistently go to is the About page. It’s the human part of a site -- proof that artificial intelligence hasn’t taken over everything -- yet. Hellen’s story prompted me to reach out to her and learn more. Her story is one of heartbreak, self-doubt, hard charging, slowing down, patience and growth. 

Read on to learn more about Hellen’s journey from fashion designer to wellness founder -- healed and healing -- all the way through.

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Tell me about you before you started HELLEN NYC.

I started young in fashion. By the time I left the industry, I was in it for about 24 years. I started when I was about 18 years old, managing a team of 50 immediately.

I was mainly in design and ended up consulting. For 11 years, when I moved to New York from LA, I consulted for brands, helped them curate and merchandise their brands and created the concept of what they had in their minds. I worked with a lot of young designers, advising them how to bring to life an idea, get it to runway, to market, connect them to sales people for that season, book it for production and take it through to make sure it was getting into the stores. So, I walked them through every process. Because I did it so many times, I knew what the next steps were going to be and what people were going to ask for to build the momentum for a successful season. 

Before consulting, I was an apparel designer for 15 years in LA and then I launched my consultancy -- it all happened naturally. My former boss from LA launched a secondary collection and hired me as a consultant. I was bicoastal for almost two years flying back and forth when I first moved to New York. That experience, and with my former boss’s encouragement, propelled me to continue working in a consultative capacity -- I’ve never worked for another company since.

What were some of the brands you worked with as a designer?

BCBG, that was the brand back in the 90s. I worked with Parallel, Katayone Adeli, and a couple years later with Rozae Nichols. Roz was an underrated talent not known as she was very shy and avoided being in the media. She didn’t do interviews. We didn’t do runway, yet we produced seven new collections every year and around 100 pieces per collection. However, we were competing with Dries Van Noten in stores all over the world, hanging our collections adjacent to his. Our collection was very layered with details, original artwork and as a result we were constantly being compared to Dries as some said our aesthetics were simpatico. Being challenged with coming up with so many ideas and long hours working with Roz, I developed a strong design sense for original work. We’d take hand printed original artwork from France and Italy and transfer them into digital formats and create prints from them -- this was when computers were just beginning to be more widely used in the industry. It was an exciting time because our creativity was challenged. We would do crazy things like burn the edges of fabric, polyurethane matte jersey, put glitter on chiffon, pound nail heads into fabric -- it was a science lab! We would make mistakes and turn them into other garments. This is what separated us – we were allowed to be creative and original thinkers. Working more with the movement of the fabric rather than starting on paper. We draped half garments and looked at it from all perspectives.

We don’t see that experiential process with apparel design as much these days. The focus is more about what’s trending, let’s copy that, use less expensive fabric and we’ll make more money. Designers aren’t being challenged to do what they do so well -- to design. 

I noticed this more and more in the last five years of my time in the industry before making the shift to launching HELLEN NYC. Design was a lot less hands-on. It became more challenging to keep up with fast fashion. Also, it’s become acceptable to copy designers’ ideas and this has challenged creativity. It was taboo at one point to copy other designers. It’s become the norm in fashion now. At Rozae Nichols, we never looked at a magazine -- we looked at art books. That was the world we lived in our ideas and that was our approach to design. Failing was the best thing because failure was where we found beauty.

The global pandemic has accelerated views on consumption as many of us have had more time to reflect while observing shelter in place. Many experienced job loss, loss of loved ones and the world going topsy turvy. Certainly, fashion isn’t the priority but we have seen a healthy boost in wellness. How did you start HELLEN NYC? Was it gradual? An immediate switch? 

I was straddling many worlds before I launched. I was experiencing multiple tragedies in my life -- my father passed away, my husband left me, and I got hit with a tax audit -- all within four months. All of these events forced me to hit pause. It shook me up. Meanwhile, I was launching three lines onto the runway that season. I had to find ways to maintain composure as I was a professional and my clients relied on me. Millions of dollars were invested in these collections. It was at this time I recognized I was a professional. I delivered and showed up every day no matter what. I managed to successfully land a brand in Barneys during that time. 

As things were falling apart, it was a time for me to reflect and figure out what it is that I want out of life. What is all of this? When a parent passes away it makes you reevaluate what’s important in life. It propelled me into reiki and the healing world. I had a real fight with it -- I didn’t want to be woo woo -- and reiki was very woo woo at that time. I didn’t talk about it with people. But I found myself going to reiki workshops on the weekend and during the week I was this professional. It felt like two lives happening at the same time. 

I didn’t realize how it all made sense until I launched my brand and wrote my bio. While writing my bio I was recalling the time while my dad was passing away and I picked up a product for him to use -- reiki infused oil. I went to the hospital and massaged it into his feet and sprayed the air with it. I had no idea what I was doing. At this point, I had no reiki training but afterward, I felt the air in the whole room settle and there was a release. I’ve always been a sensitive, spirited person. My intuition was always very strong. I just didn’t know what it was. Reiki taught me how to recognize it, be with it and guide it. I started practicing it on myself every day and experienced healing advances. Eventually, I would barter with friends and offer it to a small circle. It’s hard to put into words because it’s experiential. It guided me to keep learning. There was no intention of turning it into a business. 

I became less and less engaged with fashion at the same time -- it lost its creativity for me, the enjoyment in finding the gem in it. The process was what I loved about it and it was becoming more focused on being famous which I had no interest in. Climate change was also very important and fashion is one of the largest contributors to polluting our earth. It was very difficult for me to watch that happen. 

My friend said, I see you making these bath things and I don't know what you’re doing but you should think about selling it. In a week, I created the four formulas, the name, the intentions, and everything. I started blending and creating the concept. In a month, I had the packaging finished. What I learned is that I can’t treat it like I did with fashion. Anytime I’m pounding it down or pushing it forward, it feels like it will explode. Everything is now more of a natural flow for me. I can’t rush things that aren’t going to happen. You can’t rush energy -- it’s like a flower. You can’t force it to bloom. Launching Hellen NYC has taught me patience. To allow it to branch out and evolve naturally. It’s challenging at times because I come from a very pushy industry with very high expectations in making things happen. I’ve had to learn to be gentle on myself. It’s been a very revealing experience. It’s perfect, though. I feel like it found me, more than I found it. It’s been joyful. I feel useful knowing that I am contributing to someone’s well being. This feeling is like making millions of dollars to me. Especially when I get a text about someone’s mom using my product during her chemo session, or my nurse friend in NYC battling COVID, or helping my mother sleep better when she uses the inhaler as she’s on a dialysis machine for eight hours every evening.

What guides you in how you build your company? 

It’s to not follow a trend. I get that the money is in certain places but is that really where I need to be? For example CBD oil. I get it and why so many companies are doing it but I have to ask myself does this connect with me? I’m in the process of becoming certified as a clinical aromatherapist. I just learned about roughly 350 essential oils and they’re just as powerful as CBD. Doing HELLEN NYC isn’t led by money, it’s led by passion and results for my clients. It can be frustrating but when I stay on track with my intention it has always led me to where I want to be. Like Roz, we weren’t chasing Dries but people recognized us as being just as creative and equal in quality. Her company when I left was around 15 million. We grew that rapidly in the 3 1/2 years I was there. We were this tiny team of three. That resonated with me -- this concept of following the idea -- to follow intuition and to trust yourself and the product you produce. All falls into place.

Also, to slow down. To not judge success by what society traditionally defines success as. That’s what I’m trying to get to -- that’s why failure is the best gift. It doesn’t have to be lavish or over-marketed. It’s pristine and real. To have honor and integrity in what I do and let it speak for itself. To not judge or worry about what other people will think. This takes time to cultivate. It’s about the quality of ingredients.

Tell me about your products. How did they come about? 

What got me into doing the formula for the bath salts is a scientist, Dr. Masaru Emoto, who studied water and the effects of words and water. He wrote the book, Emoto’s Water Experiment: The Power of Thoughts. His experiments were very interesting -- for example, he’d write the word love on a cup of water, extract the water and place it under the microscope and he’d see beautiful snowflakes. Then, he’d write the word hate and then extract that water and would see molecules that looked like broken glass. His experiments made me think more about the power of words. I thought, if that’s the case then maybe that’s why I’m feeling so good after my bath -- I would reiki my bath and add crystal stones into the water. It strengthened the energy around me. You can restore yourself during a bath when you’re soaking in salts that are infused with reiki intentions, crystals, and aromatherapy. It’s a very primal activity like a fetus floating in the womb. The bath brews come with music that lasts about 20 minutes so that you have that time to absorb the trace minerals from the salt into your body. I spoke with many nurses and I consistently hear that we need magnesium.

I source my salts from a company that has a patent machine that sorts the salt all the way down to the granular level -- it gets it down to the mineral -- it kicks out the dirt, the sand, and the excess. The oils sourced are picked at its peak -- when it’s optimal to distill the plant into oil in small batches. My ingredients are of the highest grade. To me, this is what makes the difference. I then tackled the five senses to unlock the body: (1) Smell, essential oils. (2) Sight, the way you set your bath (dimming lights, candles). (3) Touch, being in the water and the crystals in the bath brew. (4) Taste, I recommend an herbal tea to replenish your body. (5) Sound, the music -- I helped produce three of the tracks with my ex-husband. It’s cinematic landscape music. You’re the protagonist. You get to close your eyes and imagine watching your life for 20 minutes. For Emerge from the Fog, my dear friends, Dynasty Electrik. They create beautifully layered sounds.

The bath brews are a kit for whatever you’re experiencing -- the oils, the crystals, the reiki, the music is all blended together for the beginner -- you don’t need to experience any of these separately or try to figure how to match it all up. I also didn’t want to make it so esoteric. I want people to notice a pretty jar of salts and try it because I get it, it comes across as woo woo and I, myself, was resistant to the woo woo! It’s been a process of getting comfortable with my calling to heal and balancing that with this being a business. I’ve met the most incredible people on the journey. I definitely have to deal with ego -- how fast can I do it? How big can I make this? The fashion experience in my past -- I have to silence it.

Tell me about your operations. Your environment. Your day.

I was based in Brooklyn, New York for 11 years and got a really strong calling to pick up and move back to LA to be with my mom who has fallen ill. It was a very daring thing to do in the middle of year one of my business. The team that I had in NY had to be dissolved. My brand is HELLEN NYC and I’m moving out of New York! I just thought to myself, it’s all going to be fine. I basically moved my business into my mom's garage for the time being, until I grow out of it. It’s also practical as I am her caregiver at this time. I’ve been building my team in LA to support the operations. As a small business, every day is so different. Yet there are a few things that are consistent – shipping happens usually on Tuesday and Thursdays. Meetings are Mondays or Wednesdays. Fridays are recapping the week and on weekends I blend products.

What’s next? 

Right now, I’m figuring out the next steps through the COVID-19 crisis. I’ve become very involved in trying to find ways to provide PPE and connecting with my fashion network to source and make masks. It also led me to work with my friends who are on the front line. I’ve been providing product donation care packages to doctors and nurses and friends because it’s been intense for them. My newest product is an inhaler. It’s essential oils that you breathe in. It’s portable and it’s refillable. It’s great for meditation, to add to your yoga practice, for starting your day or winding down your day. Essential oils are effective because they positively impact your olfactory system when you inhale the aroma. From there it goes straight to your limbic system and it immediately affects your mood. There are seven different intentions to suit your needs. I’ve sold 200 already through word of mouth. There’s also the Shower Palm Inhalation. You place a few drops in your palm while in the shower, rub together, inhale through your nose and exhale through your mouth. Neither of these products is on the site yet and has been selling like crazy through word of mouth! 

When I think about extensions of the line I think about our modern life faced with impacts of deep anxiety. Aromatherapy is an important ritual to use in your everyday life. For example, some people don’t have bathtubs or have the time to soak for 20 minutes. Then you have those who are ritual bathers and use our bath brews weekly. In reviewing my sales and reading feedback, it’s what inspired me to create the Shower Palm Inhalation. In coming up with the inhaler, I thought about my friends who were experiencing tough or stressful moments who would use it, sit a moment during that transition and be able to work through it a little better. It doesn’t make the problem or tough moment go away! It helps give you a little strength to manage through, it forces you to breathe and take a pause. So, the next step is about continuing to create products to give more people access, and to accommodate their lives, to increase self-care. 

I’m working on a pilot program with UTMB (University of Texas Medical Branch) and preparing care kits for healthcare professionals. In partnership with UTMB, I designed and created the Wellness Room. We’ll be projecting sound baths on the wall. We’ll have mats for people to lay down and sanitizer sprays to keep things hygienic. They’ll receive inhalers, listen to music and rejuvenate before they go back out into the pediatric intensive care unit. The care kit that we’re putting together will include several items from HELLEN NYC and items from my friends who are founders -- tea from The Qi and hand salves from Lauren’s All-Purpose. This will all launch the first week of May for Healthcare Heroes Month. 

A dear friend who is a therapist for teens found that my products would be good for her clients as she was looking for non-invasive, safe, and helpful ways for teens to get into the habit of self-care. 

Healing and supporting healers have been a large part of my mission. There’s mutual gratitude in the work I’ve been doing. People share their feedback and appreciation and I feel grateful that my community trusts me with their wellbeing. There’s a beautiful connection with each project that I’ve been working on. 

I’m excited about where I’m going. 

Ways to explore Hellen:

Website   www.hellen.nyc

Instagram @hellennewyork

NOTE: All photos courtesy of Hellen Yuan.